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deer country | ic inbox
the arms of the ocean are carrying me
the arms of the ocean delivered me
[ text | voice | omen | action ]
the arms of the ocean are carrying me
the arms of the ocean delivered me
[ text | voice | omen | action ]
the arms of the ocean are carrying me
the arms of the ocean delivered me
[ text | voice | omen | action ]
no subject
But he's not meant to be the dominant one, when that happens. This is, however, a special situation. He couldn't leave her alone. Not when she's suffering, aching, afraid.... And waking Peter really wouldn't do much good; all the boy could really do would be wake her, and... that may steal Luna from her nightmares, but it would also cost her precious sleep.
No, this is something only Paimon can do. Lull her into a pleasant place, create somewhere safe and secure for her so that she can continue resting. Free of fear, anxiety, ache. He spins his creativity to give her a beautiful place, and he gives her Peter, and he watches the witch slowly settle, her breathing relaxing, her muscles still.
Time passes, and he doesn't keep track of how much. It could be hours; he stays where he is, lying beside her, eyes staring, every ounce of his energy focused on her. The dream has no agenda, no plot to unfold. He simply lets her rest there in the space, and makes sure that no darker things trickle in from the corners of Luna's mind. He creates his own boundaries against them, shielding her from any whispers of cruel things.
When she finally stirs, he still doesn't move. Not even when those wide eyes open, glowing out into the darkness like some creature of the deep sea. The demon needs to make sure she's still all right, that this isn't a segue into sleepwalking — as he knows she's prone to do. He's certainly followed her around the house on more than one occasion to make sure she doesn't get in some sort of danger.
But no, Luna seems truly awake. And it's then that she calls his name, and when she does his eyes shift and widen with a sort of glimmer of recognition. He stares at her for a long moment, letting the last of his influence trickle away. )
It is not morning. ( He answers softly. Somehow he knows, despite the fact there's no true way to tell. Somehow he's starting to know many things. The demon's voice quietens further, a soft hush that's almost a whisper. )
Everything is all right. Safe to go back into sleep. ( Since she's tired, groggy, she can rest more if she likes. Luna certainly could do with all the sleep she can get. )
Your dream was bad... scary. So I fixed it. It is safe now.
no subject
But she doesn't, hearing the mention of a bad dream. Her eyes open a little more and she across at him curiously for a few moments. Her dream was scary, he... fixed it. Luna's expression shifts into uncertainty, taking a moment to recall. What had she been dreaming about...? ]
I was having a nightmare. [ She voices it softly, with that slow-dawning realisation. It feels so strange; to have a nightmare and to not wake up so disturbed and distressed. Even the ones that wouldn't have her up, crying and panicked, would have her waking in the mornings feeling uncomfortable, a little internally shaken before she would wake herself up and carry on with her day.
She's quiet for a long moment, recollecting; moving slowly, the rising panic, Maul. Peter's — not Peter — hands at her throat. And then... colour, softness; the warm fragrant breeze of a field of wildflowers, some fantastical place. ]
It changed. That... was you—? You did that—? [ She's stunned, even in the hushedness of her voice. Paimon... knew she was having a nightmare. ] That's... that's why I feel, I don't know.... good? Calm—? You did that.
[ Emotional support is not a concept she's unfamiliar with, considering her relationship with him, her bond. Offering that steadiness is something she's already experienced in ways, he's given that to her before. That he's sensitive to her, her emotions. But... dreams—? He can see her dreams—? She's sure, in some sleepy recollection, she remembers something about dreams. Still, it's not something she realised he was capable of, it's... new. ]
I didn't know you could do that.
no subject
I did.... I fixed it.
( He doesn't even really know how to describe what it is, only that it's felt... right. )
I did not know either. Not for a long time. But now.... I feel... more. More whole. More better.
...I can do more things.
( This place not keeping him under a certain padding, not keeping his powers muted down.... His continuing to learn about himself.... forming more connections with others.... and Peter slowly growing just a little bit stronger, able to handle Paimon in certain ways that he once wasn't. All of these factors have perhaps helped the demon become more, again. Even if he still has a way to go when it comes to fully regaining his true self, if it can ever even be done. )
I can help your mind stop hurting. ( There's a soft frown as he remembers those soft sounds, and the way her face had looked. Upset, pained. )
...I heard you crying out, when you slumbered. Your dream was.... very bad.
no subject
And it's new; things even he didn't know he could do, either. Luna knows well enough the Dream affected them, it certainly put limitations on her magic — would exhaust her if she pushed herself too hard. Healing magic wouldn't work (and it still doesn't work here, it still has its limitations) but here in the Waking World, things are... much different. More so for him than her. She's awestruck as his words settle in. It's a far cry from how he used to be, the ways in which he's slowly regaining parts of himself — no longer so lost and weakened. ]
You saw my nightmare...? You saw what it was about? [ There's a stirring of guilt in her, something a little mortified too. Mostly of the fact he's seen something hurtful, something her own mind's conjured — her fears of losing Peter, of him turning into something that... isn't even Paimon, either. A shade of the demon who would hurt her, like when he'd attacked her back in Deerington. ]
I'm sorry— [ He'll tell her it isn't her fault, but she feels regretful he saw such a thing. She can't imagine it wasn't pleasant for him to see that.
But she's... deeply touched by the gesture, despite that guilt and odd mortification over the whole thing. He slowly reclaims himself, and then helps her; reaches in to manipulate her dreams for good, to stop her hurting. It's... a huge, strange sensation in her chest, hard to process. Her heart feels... full. She's stunned, lost for words.
It wells up in her, seeps through her in her tired, emotional state. Gratefulness, guilt, and a quiet kind of peace. Her eyes fill with tears, gravity quickly taking them and splashing them down — sideways over her face, over the bridge of her nose — into the pillow. ]
... I'm not upset with you. [ She utters it when she realises her tears. He'll know that, surely. He'll feel she's not upset with him. But she oddly feels the need to say it. ]
no subject
'I'm sorry—'
Indeed, he's opening his mouth to respond to that, when suddenly Luna's crying. Openly, the water leaking from her eyes, moving down. His own eyes widen, surprised, upset — reaching slowly towards her face with one hand. )
Oh— No—
( In his surprise, he almost sounds too much like Peter, fumbling with his own words a little. Fingertips find her cheek, brush against the tears there. She isn't upset with him, he can feel it, but he doesn't understand. It's voiced softly, though the worry's clear in his expression, the way he stares so intently, drawing close. )
Why are you crying? Is it still scary?
( Maybe she's thinking of it, still. Gently, his hand cups her face, the way she's done to him, the way Peter's done to her — imitates the gesture of comfort. His palm presses to Luna's cheek, so that any new tears won't run down it, but against his hand instead. )
no subject
Is it still scary? She can feel the hand as her cheek, the quiet shifting as he pulls closer to her. Her head shakes, the slightest of movements — not wanting to disturb his hand from where it rests. ]
No, it's not that. [ She sniffles softly, trying to find the words. It's difficult for her to even explain. ] They're... kind of... happy tears...?
[ Kind of, sort of. Mostly. There's another long moment as she tries to put it the right way for him to understand. ]
You took away the nightmare, you gave me a good dream. Even if I hadn't asked you to. You helped, and I'm... I'm very thankful... in a way I can't... put into words.
But I'm also sorry you had to see the nightmare in the first place, because it was hurtful.
no subject
That's the closest context the demon can draw from, though he's still concerned, gaze wide and searching — looking from one of Luna's wet eyes to the other, back and forth, slowly like that. He's sitting up more, so that he can lift his other arm and find her cheek with that hand too, cupping her face with both now.
She's thankful, and he's pleased to hear that, but... he's worried. She's sorry, too. The demon stares; he knows what sorry is, by now. He's said it to her himself, after what happened with Maul. It means... you feel bad. Regretful. )
No... no, my witch. My little one. Do not be sorry. ( The endearment comes as he's smoothing his palms back against her cheeks over and over, slowly and gently, some gesture of petting. But.... her words do give him pause as he thinks about it. )
....I did not like watching it. ( Paimon has to admit, quietly. Seeing that strange thing he knows he can be... remembering her fear. She'd dreamed of it, and perhaps.... )
Are you still.... scared of me?
no subject
The question has her taken aback, though — scared of him—? Enough so that she can't answer straight away, can only stare with parted lips. Quickly she shakes her head, still trying not to disturb his hands. No, she's not scared of him. Of course, things have not been easy between them over the last year. With Maul interfering, with Paimon's attempted possession of her, and perhaps even with Peter falling to Corruption back in December.
But his own awareness of himself, and how his actions (even often through no fault of his own) have affected her — it's driven him to be careful with her, to be gentler. He's mindful. And it's certainly helped to mend the damages done between them, Luna's been grateful. Their relationship has been better, as it still moves and grows and evolves within this new world. ]
I— I know you would never choose to hurt me. [ She knows that, and believes it wholeheartedly. One hand reaches up to rest it on top of his as it holds her cheek, a gentle kind of reassurance. There's a tired smile, but it falters. It doesn't explain the dream does it—? ]
I suppose... I'm always scared of what you might become. Of losing Peter. [ So much has been going on, especially in the last few months. Things that will always be rattling around in her mind, pressed down to not actively think about them but — they're there. There's a long exhale, weary. ]
And— perhaps those fears will... always be there. And I'm sorry that they will be. [ She sniffles, shakes her head once more. She's regretful of that, that he's had to see that. She will always worry of losing Peter, it's the price ones pays for loving someone.
... But she'll worry about losing Paimon, too. Him becoming something he's not, turning into something cold and violent. It's something shaped differently to how she feels for Peter, a deep care — she doesn't want to lose him either. ]
But I don't— please don't think that means I'm scared of you. I know you. You're a good demon. You're very good to me, and that... means so much.